Culinary Concoctions Week Six: The Ingredient

So...math equation for you all:

(Work Stress + Life Stress) (Lack of sleep + Middle-of-the-week Tummy Woes)  = Me cooking, but not writing about it.

I can't believe how I've fallen behind with blogging this week! Dang it!

So...with that, a brief on this week's ingredient, chicory.

Jason and I went to (surprise, surprise) the Hillsdale Farmer's Market on Sunday and raided Ayer Creek Farm's stand, meddling our way in between women stockpiled with parsnips, salad greens and slices of winter squash boasting the boldest orange hue I've ever seen, to pick up a few bunches of chicory.

"I have no idea what to do with these," I confessed to Jason, whose eye was wandering to the one pound bag of ground cornmeal (that yes, he subsequently purchased).

So, come Sunday night, I did my research:

Chicory, a/k/a blue sailors, coffee weed and succory, is a bushy perennial herbaceous plants that's cultivate for salad leaves. However, it's roots are also used, baked then ground and used as a coffee substitute.

In the US, real chicory is often confused as curly endive. They're not one in the same. However, chicory leaves also include raddichio (a/k/a choke lettuce), sugarleaf and Belgian endives.

Ahhhh it all makes sense now.

To really geek out with ingredient research...I found that the chicory plant is one of the earliest plants cited in recorded literature. Horace mentions it in his own diet: "As for me, olives, endives and mallows provide substance." While I loathe olives, at least that gives me a starting point for creating a recipe.

Moreover, Lord Monboddo described the plant in 1779 as the 'chicoree,' which the French cultivated as a pot herb (No, fellow Portlanders, not a pot pot herb). Rather, chicory is, and has been since the Napoleanic Era, used in coffee or as a coffee substitute. And of course, even the Egyptians used it for the same purpose.

Recipe starting point number two...complete.

More about the recipe tomorrow!

Confession of a One-time Smoker

I've got a really major confession to make. I mean, it's a big one. You could easily call it a doozy.

I smoked a cigarette.

Okay, that's a lie. I smoked a pack of cigarettes.

I know, I know. I deserve more than just a simple, "Shame on you."

Allow me to explain.

It went down like this. I've been dealing with a slew of stressful and emotional issues of late -- break ups, pending surgeries, insanely demanding job to name a few -- when, there I was, cleaning out my car during what became the most inane of torrential downpours -- according to Portland meteorological records, it was the most rain Portland, the city infamous for gloomy rain, had ever gotten in one time -- when I reached deep underneath my passenger's seat and felt a box like I had never felt before.

Pulling it out, I learned that it was a pack of Marlboro's that belonged to my boyfriend's -- ugh, my ex's -- best friend. I was ready to put the box into my trash bag already teeming with coffee cups and empty Jelly Bellies boxes when I noticed there was still one solitary cigarette hiding beneath the gold foil.

I threw the bag away and kept that solitary cigarette.

I dried off, soaked after half-standing in the rain for 30 minutes (What can I say? My car was messy!), and stared at the cigarette, sitting on my table, beckoning me like I was Alice. I could see the words written on its white, half-crumpled body: "Smoke me," like it was my key through the door to Wonderland.

And so, I did. I grabbed a pack of matches from my closet, ran outside to my apartment's fire escape and lit up.

Trust me, as a runner...yes, now a runner who chain-smoked a pack of cigarettes...I know how awful smoking is for the body. I cherish my lungs, my heart and my body -- they've all been with me and have held their own relatively well so, to completely destroy all three with the puff of one cigarette is seemingly nonsensical. I mean, studies show that smoking just one single cigarette increases the stiffness of the arteries in people my age, 18 to 30, by a whopping 25 percent. That's not good for the body.

Yet, despite these stats, an alarmingly large percentage -- 17.9 of adults in Oregon -- of the US population still smokes. It's really no wonder why the CDC named cigarette smoking as the leading preventable cause of death in our nation.

Most scientific research shows that the compulsion to smoke again after that first cigarette can lie dormant for three years. My compulsion lay low for a whopping 48 hours. As disgusting as it felt afterwards -- the smell of nicotine and smoke lingered in my nostrils while the taste of raw, burning chemicals and tobacco pierced my every taste bud -- I got the point of such pitiful and disgraceful agony and depression that I needed to turn to something.

And that's when my mouth started to get dry. And when my fingers started to itch. And when my new-found arrhythmia began to explode in my chest.

I knew I wanted -- needed -- a cigarette. So, with unsteady footsteps, I walked to the corner store and nonchalantly bought a pack. And then I went to town; huffing and puffing on one right after another until, much to my surprise, I had none left.

And that's when it hit me: Nicotine is, as every healthcare advocate and worker will tell you, the most addictive drug. It's smarmy, making you feel cool...like those ultra hip yet laid-back 20-somethings who read and write in the park. It's comforting, releasing you from experiencing the stress of real life. It's intoxicatingly indulgent...like allowing yourself to have a thick slice of sinfully rich cake.

Unlike that cake's moment on your lips that stays on your hips, the damage caused by a moment with a cigarette isn't possible to eradicate and it's much harder to say, "No thanks," to another cigarette than it is to another slice of cake. Why? As any smoker will probably tell you -- it's the withdrawal that makes the body scream for a kid like ice cream, "YES, PLEASE! I want ANOTHER!"

And so, it's a mind game: At first I'm dealing with the taste in my mouth and the stench in my nose that doesn't seem nearly as bad when there's a cigarette at reach. And the physical effects -- my shaky hands, awkward heart beat, the feeling that my tongue is growing larger and larger. Then there's the dizziness, unbalanced by that awful sense of vertigo like I'm swaying on a boat that has no exit.

It's enough hell to make me wonder, "Why'd I ever do this in the first place?"

Perfect Playlist

For a bit of shameless self promotion...

Wait...isn't that what a blog is anyway? Whatever.

How about...for a bit of extended shameless self promotion.

I have YET to share that I was on the radio last week with my friend Tony who I work with at AngelVision for 94.7's Widmer's Perfect Playlist.

For those of you NOT from Portland, let me explain: Every weekday at 5 p.m. -- quitting time if you work anywhere else OTHER than AngelVision (Okay I can't complain too much, I typically do leave at 5 every day...but I've always got my laptop bag draping over my shoulder next to my hippie bag which, might I add, I am soooo in the need for a new one) -- Gustav from 94.7 hosts a five song playlist made up by, well, anyone. All you have to do is submit a playlist along with an explanation for your songs and, of course, information about yourself to Gustav via email and hope and pray that your list is awesome enough to get chosen.

Here's what Tony and I submitted earlier this month:

Tony and Amie's Widmer's Perfect Playlist

Theme: A Day at AngelVision

Tony and I work together at a marketing company in Tigard called AngelVision Technologies.  AT AV we make impact movies -- 3 to 3 1/2 minute movies that serve as marketing tools for companies to use in 20 different way (We've got to put the company plug in somewhere, right?). My role at AV is as a scriptwriter while Tony is a flash developer. Basically, I write the script for the movie while Tony puts my words and cues and directions into action (But making them way cooler than I could ever imagine). In essence, it's a relationship built to last; I tell Tony what to do and he complies, ten-fold (Isn't that what any girl wants?). I kid, of course...though our two minds have been known to create some of the craftiest, though easily most twisted plots and ideas.

It's a good thing they rarely ever come to fruition (Though our band 80s Montage Limbo would, by far, be the best obscure band...maybe ever).

What really brought Tony and I together, aside from our shared love for sushi, zombies and creating obscure band names, is indeed, music. While Tony's more hardcore than I am on his Pandora (The guy eats through his free 40 hours before the fifth of the month) and despite our shared differences in favorite artists (His = Radiohead, Mine = Jack Johnson), we share enough common bonds to interrupt each other enough during the day over instant messenger to gush about whatever song is streaming through our ear buds (Or, if you're like Tony, giant headphones).

Our perfect playlist is a recreation of our typical day at AngelVision -- starting out dead tired in the morning after a long day AND night of writing and flash development, only to trudge on with more work so we can feel totally gangsta after FINALLY finishing a project...before being stuck in traffic after day's end to finally  make it home.

Here's our list of glory:
1. Sleepyhead, Passion Pit (Need we say more? Love the band and the song is perfect to kick the day off with...heck, it's my ringtone and alarm)

2. Work, Hockey (This song hits a couple of points: During our first conversation, Tony asked if I liked hockey, based off a Windows Live status I had up that said, "Wake up with Hockey." Of course, I responded, gushing about the Portland band Hockey...only to find out that he was, in fact, talking ice and pads and sticks and pucks. We also have a special place in our hearts for Canada.)

3. Paper Planes, MIA (There's nothing like celebrating the completion of a project, especially ones for difficult clients, than playing Paper Planes and letting our suburban white kid exterior disappear as we thug around like...well, you know..thugs)

4. No Cars Go, Arcade Fire (Tony's REAL favorite band is Arcade Fire which I, too, am totally down with. They're just...so...good)

5. Home, Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros (Every time one of use hears this song on Pandora we ping each other with new lyrics...sort of like a bragging right. Of course, sometimes I cheat and pull it up on YouTube just so I can hear it. It's funky and folky and Jade's voice and the whistling are simply to die for).

And our alternative: Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots, The Flaming Lips (This song, of course, is a great alternate to Paper Planes because something, throughout the workday, we have to battle crazy clients who well, try to eat us...and stuff).

At any rate, we received an email back a little over a week after submitting our Perfect Playlist and, within five days were ON THE RADIO.

I don't think I had ever been so nervous in my whole entire life. Okay, that's obviously hyperbolic but I was surprised by how awkward sweaty I got over being on the radio. It was like the feeling you get when going on a first date...multiplied by 10, and on crack. Like really good freak out crack (Of course, not that I would actually know).

The experience actually turned out to be a blast...not that I had an any inkling that my radio debut would turn out otherwise. But still, I'm a nervous wreck prior to any kind of recording where I know SOMEONE is going to be hearing my voice. Nevertheless, despite some shakiness at the beginning (I stuttered a bit when explaining how I got into Hockey) on my part, Tony and I managed to pull off a smooth and seamless radio show. We even had a guy call in half way through Edward Sharpe and demand...okay fine, suggest...that Tony and I get an hour to run music every day because we were, indeed, "Just that awesome."

While we were hoping for some birthday luck on pocketing Arcade Fire concert tickets (It was Tony's birthday the day we went on the air), we ended up with, like everyone else that week, tickets to see Sublime in November. On a Tuesday. Without their real lead singer. We've already vowed to make complete asses of ourselves, demanding old school, REAL Sublime songs.

Go big or go home, right?

Writing Fitness

I already know I’m not in running shape. The 20 and 30 minute walk jogs of huffing and puff lace my Nikes up for every other day for are pretty substantial evidential proof of that.

I’m surprised to find out that I’m out of writing shape…mainly because I didn’t think that was possible.

Yet, here I am, sitting at home with a bag of Trader Joe’s frozen petite peas nestled on my right wrist and forearm (I have to save the ice for cocktails with the world’s worst vodka, after all), nursing what I’m certain is developing tendonitis.

A quick medical lesson for those of you aren’t familiar with tendonitis: As my oh-so-scientific-looking picture shows (And no, I didn’t draw it), tendonitis occurs when a tendon is inflamed from overuse. For the wrist, that means the thin, little muscles and tendons that move these texting, typing, dishwashing hands of mine up, down, left and right are probably throwing little temper tantrums from repetitive keyboard typing and mouse usage.

At first I was a bit afraid I was developing carpal tunnel syndrome after just eight days at my new job but realized, after a bit of Google searching, that since I’m not experiencing any numbness or tingling in my palm, thumb or index finger, that I can luckily rule that secretarial injury out the window.

But then I realized I could be developing tendonitis since my wrist and outer forearm are aching like a beeeeeeeyotch. I first noticed the pain during the final hour of my day at the office (Goodness, how American and adult and suburbanly mature do I sound saying that?!) on Monday but it subsided by the time I was drinking a beer and watching ‘Secretary.’ On Tuesday I noticed that the pain began a little bit earlier in the day and didn’t subside; it was so annoying that I couldn’t bring myself even to Facebook after getting home and carrying the basket at the grocery store was a wee bit more than my tiny wrist and skeletor forearm preferred to carry. Then yesterday the pain began around noon and didn’t go away – probably because my ‘office’ is actually a room equipped with a 24/7 cooling vent that won’t shut off which means it’s freeeeeeeeezing (Yes Mom, I’m imitating you), making me cold to the bones – and working at PB, even for the short time I did, made it worse. Cooking dinner? A nightmare. Changing the radio station while driving my car? Yowch. And don’t get me started on the anguish I had while texting.

It throbbed as I went to bed, even after washing down ibuprofen with the last dregs of my Bridgeport Hop Czar.

It throbbed as I woke up this morning, still zombified. It hurt in the shower while washing my hair, in the car while banging my steering wheel with curses at traffic.

And it hurts now, after sitting for the Channel 13’s hour of The Office with frozen peas on arm.

Hmm. Maybe I should go to the doctor (Or suck it up and stop being a wimp?).

And, from the looks of my condensation-laden bag sweating on my arm, to the grocery store to pick up some non-mushy pods.

Comeback comeback

So this is the second “I’m blogging again” post that I’ve written since starting my blog way back in late November.

Whatever.

A lot of people have tried the comeback comeback and, considering I’m pretty awesome, I figure that I can re-earn the love and trust and loyalty of the few people who actually read my blog just like others.

I mean just look at Robert Downey Junior: He started his acting career at the age of five and grew up on screen and in the tube throughout the ‘90s (I write like I actually witnessed this but, considering that he was born 21 years my senior, it’s obvious to assume I’m pontificating over celebrity nonsense) before going totally off the drug-induced deep end for a solid five years. He tried to comeback with a role in Alley McBeal in 2000 but didn’t hit life-changing rock bottom until he was on the Oprah Show in 2004 (What is it about that woman?) when he realized he couldn’t actually continue a life of jail and drugs.

Now he’s a super awesome bad ass who runs around in iron suits, beating up bad guys and trying to get into The Avengers. His role as Iron Man is laden with such irony (IRONy?) too that it’s submissively comical: An ex-drug addict superstar cleans up and plays an ex-alcoholic superhero. Classic.

Comeback Specimen Number Two: Britney Spears.

In a one sentence summary of her life; she tumbled down from her throne as a Mouseketeer turned teen idol turned adult-man idol turned cracked out Las Vegas-eloping (to a Wangster, none the less!), Madge-kissing, baby-having, head-shaving nut job. Now she’s all back and hot, making music that makes the white boys at Pottery Barn shake it in the early morning like they’re Beyonce (You know who you are and I miss being all OCD about the store with you terribly).

You might say she only had one comeback attempt but she had two; remember when she tried to be all clean and sober after her second son? As we all saw on Family Guy, which obviously didn’t pan out too well for her.

And the third comeback comeback of the blog post would have to be Brett Favre.

Wait. No…he never successfully came back, did he (Insert an, ‘Oooooh, Sick Burn’ tease here)?

At any rate, what I mean to say through my random celebrity knowledge (Which I did actually have to wiki because, let’s face it, I don’t care enough about celebrity life to have these factoids readily available within my brain), is that I am making my comeback comeback into the blogosphere.  I’ve had enough people tell me that I need to/should blog again (Ahem, Clara) and, to appease and hopefully entertain them, I’ve gone ahead and succumbed to peer pressure.

I should probably work on that slight flaw in my character. If I keep doing everything my friends and family suggest to me I might become a full-on, 24/7 carnivore (Ahem, Walker), dye my hair hot pink or red (Ahem, Mom, Sean) and become really fat, just because I can (Ahem, Diane).

Luckily I don’t have an agent telling me I should get back into the game.

Because Lord knows, the last thing I want to be is a comeback comeback comeback like Brett Favre. Sometimes enough is enough.

So this is what it's like to be high

I am pretty damn blitzed right now. While I'm not out of my mind baked right now (Hey, I can produce a blog post after all), I'm definitely baked enough that, were you to prick me with a toothpick to test my doneness, I'd leave but a few gooey marks of still-raw batter, indicating that I still need a bit more oven time. Still, I'm definitely stoned enough that, as much as I tried to hide it during the last few hours of my 7 1/2 hour day at Pottery Barn, I showed classic signs of dopey aloofness. As if I need the proof, here's a conversation I had over Facebook chat with a manager:

Kurtis: How are you feeling lady?

Me: Oh fine and dandy. I left 1/2 an hour early cause i was, well, you know, stoned.

Kurtis: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat? You were stoned? Couldn't tell.

Me: duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude I know. Not good. Not good at all. I feel all funny like I'm at Candy Mountain.

Kurtis: you ARE at Candy Mountain!

The sad thing is that Kurtis is probably right. I am, thanks to the eight bottles of pain pills -- both OTC and prescription (which aren't my prescriptions but hey, what are you going to do when the doctor won't get back to you?) -- and antihistamines (drugs makes me itchy), definitely on Candy Mountain: a magical place with talking unicorns that doesn't really make sense to anyone unless you have a weird sense of ridiculous humor or, as in my case, are high.

Of course, anyone who knows me knows that I've never danced with Mary Jane and don't really ever plan to. It's just not my thing and well, I'll leave it at that (Again for those who know me, you get what I'm talking about). Regardless of my stance on pot, I think that I have some kind of idea what its like to be stoned. Mainly because, ever since about three pm today, I've been loopy and relaxed while giggling at the most ridiculous things (Ahem, Charlie and Candy Mountain) and yearning for foods like chocolate chip cookies and tacos.

And muffins.

And Mike and Ikes.

Oooh -- and a tuna melt. I don't even like tuna melts; the thought of canned tuna mixed with mayo sitting next to a slab of melted cheese on buttery bread is actually pretty nauseating...but still sounds so damn good.

What was I talking about? Yes, being high. I've been pretty A-D-D all day today, unable to concentrate on simple tasks like finding a pillow for a guest or reading a full article in the Sunday paper. My attention span is thus next to nothing (hence the reason why this post has taken me over four hours to write) as is my short term memory (I failed greatly trying to tell a friend tonight what I did during my day yesterday and how my day  today at work was).

But, for the first time in a while, I feel totally at peace; all at once relaxed, soothed and happy. It's a feeling I could get used to.