Culinary Adventures of a Southern Belle

As vowed in a previous blog, I have cooked something brand new. I spent most of my Sunday in the kitchen trying my hand at a new recipe and cooking technique.

The role of my precious beets was insignificant (The greens wilted and I had used two of three making borscht the day before). But, I must confess -- boisterously tooting my own haute horn -- that I was pretty successful venturing out of my culinary cushion of comfortable classics and into a palatable pilgrimage of -- that's right -- pulled pork.

The idea for pulled pork practically leaped off of the news page last Tuesday when The Oregonian's FOODday section featured pulled pork recipes. But, after a week of long days and longer nights (Damn Nymph), I didn't get around to implementing it until Sunday afternoon.

After walking to Safeway with Walker in the slightly drizzling June-uary morning to pick up pork shoulder and collard greens, I paid homage to my southern roots, throwing on my housewife apron (Okay I'm neither a housewife nor do I own an apron) and flopping open my Joy of Cooking cookbook to cook up a mean and manly meal of pulled pork with North Carolina-style barbecue sauce, spicy vinegar coleslaw and slow-braised collard (pronounced cawl-uhd) greens.

Now, I was pretty scared that I had bitten off more than I could chew but it turns out that slow-roasting pork and slow-braising vegetables is like water off of a duck's back: easy, easy, easy.

Pulled Pork with Spice Rub:
I made a spice mixture of cumin (Which you can buy bulk at Safeway!), paprika, ground chili powder,  brown sugar (pronounced shu-gah), nutmeg (A substitution for mace, which my recipe called for at 1 tsp. nutmeg for 1/4 tsp. mace), salt and pepper. Do I know the actual measurements? Of course not...but equal parts brown sugar and paprika with hefty and equal bouts of salt and chili powder seemed about right. I got two pork shoulder roasts, about 2 pounds each, which I rubbed tenderly with the spice rub, whispering to with love and care, to take up every little morsel and grain of spice. I'm sure Walker thought I was crazy.

In an oven-safe pan, I heated up rendered bacon fat (What else would I use?), shimmied both roasts in and browned all sides, about three minutes each side. Then, with my oven preheated to 325 degrees, I popped that pot -- tightly covered with aluminum foil -- onto a center rack in my oven and let it brood for three aroma-inducing hours.

Collard Greens:
In another big pot (Big pots equate to Southern cooking in my book) I tossed six strips of roughly chopped uncured Applewood smoked bacon (It's the only kind you can get from Trader Joe's). Letting those get nice and crispy -- which is key, because the two hours of braising they'll undergo can make them as limp as a dishrag -- I tossed in salt and pepper before adding 3 cups water and 1 cup beef broth (I would have gone equal parts but was low in stock), letting it come to a whisper of a boil before adding one head of coarsely chopped, de-ribbed and de-stemmed collard greens. After making sure the greens wilted a smidgen and were completely swimming in the bacony-beefy stock, I reduced the heat to medium-low, covered them and, like my pork shoulder, let them stew for two hours in aromatic heaven.

North Carolina Barbecue Sauce:
Now this recipe I took directly from my Joy of Cooking cookbook but tweaked it with 1 TBSP of honey after tasting it and, much to my heat and spice-taking palate and chagrin, finding it hotter than a two dollar pistol. In this North Carolina sauce (Dubbed North Carolina-style because it isn't tomato/ketchup based) I included 3/4 cup apple cider vinegar, 3/4 cup distilled white vinegar, 1 TBSP hot sauce (I'd reduce this next time), 2 TBSP sugar, 2 tsps chili flake and salt and pepper to taste. While it wasn't nearly as good as what Podnah's Pit BBQ offers, it's spicy acidity ended up mixing well with the smoky-sugary warmth of the pulled pork.

Spicy Vinegar Coleslaw:
Since I can't have dairy and Walker doesn't like mayonnaise, I had to concoct a dairy-and-mayo-free coleslaw recipe. Again, calling on my beloved Podnah's, I tried to recreate a vinegar-based coleslaw with apple cider vinegar, a splash of lemonade (I would have preferred a freshly-squeezed lemon but didn't have one on me), Dijon mustard and vegetable oil. Whipping that up, I poured it over a mixture of  chopped jalapeno pepper (reduce the heat by removing the membrane and seeds) shredded cabbage, carrot and, as promised, beet and let it sit 20 minutes before serving.

And oh, what a grand serving it was: Cold, crunchy coleslaw and hot, tender pulled pork stacked high and voluptuously between beautifully buttered buns slathered with get-all-over-your-face-and-don't-even-care barbecue sauce. Mmmm. Mmmm. Mmmm.

That sounded much more pornographic that it should have...

...but really, it was deliciously sinister enough to make a preacher curse.

I sure do reckon.